Sunday, July 26, 2009

It's a Negative

Went in for bloodwork a week ago and discovered that the FET was not successful. For some strange reason these embryos did not want to stick around in my uterus...and now I'm beginning to take it personally. What is so wrong with my uterus? Sure, I've only seen it on ultrasound, but it seems like a nice spot to burrow in and stay for nine months. Yes, I'm beginning to get a complex as to why embryos do not want to stick around inside my body.

Emotionally it's been a roller coaster this past week after going off the hormones. I have energy again, which is amazing, but I cry when reading or watching something sentimental or sad. Then I had this obsession with buying a red handbag. Strange, but I had to have a red one and I did find one at Macy's. I'm just now clueing into the fact that perhaps this red bag symbolizes my uterus...maybe I would like a new one that is more welcoming to embryos...hmmmm.

The other emotional thing is that DH found out on Friday that he needs to be in the UK for meetings this upcoming week. He flew out this morning and I'm feeling sad. Sad because he's gone and also because I would have loved to have joined him on this trip. Unfortunately, booking airplane tickets at the last minute means the fares are astronomical, and since we are planning another FET within the next six weeks that means we have no extra cash to spend for airfare. I'm ticked off that we didn't know about it sooner and therefore may have been able to purchase cheaper tickets or been able to use points. It would have been cool to hang in London this week and take my mind off my 'hostile' uterus.

Enough of my pity party. First I'll track DH's flight on and then it's time for some housecleaning therapy, because later I have a date with Mad Men season one.


Phoebe said...

I'm so sorry. I was crushed when our FET did not work. I grieved for at least two months. I still grieve, but not as much. Big hugs to you. I know how tough this is.

Anonymous said...

Sorry about the FET, and that you can't go with your DH. Now is a nice time to get away from normal life for a bit. Maybe you could do a mini weekend closer to home while he's away?

Sounds like you are getting right back into an FET cycle, hopefully these guys will stick around for you!

Suzanne said...

I'm so sorry that it didn't work. You're in my thoughts and prayers.

Parenthood For Me said...

Hi. I am a first time visitor. I really like your blog name and Babe lists. Nicole Kidman is an adoptive mom. Sorry about your negative FET. It just sucks.