I am really missing the winter olympics right now. Watching the winter olympics on television helped to get my mind off the miscarriage as I could really lose myself watching the different competitions. This week I've been trying to watch old movies on TCM, but it doesn't have the same effect.
What is really weird lately is my lack of interest in fashion magazines and shopping. Usually the mere thought of retail therapy is enough to rouse me out of the deepest valley, but it is not working. DH came home from a trade show yesterday with a $50 Bloomingdales gift card he won because he wore a giveaway button (??). It made me happy but not exactly excited.
The other strange thing is my lack of appetite, but this could be an after effect of the miscarriage from the drop in hormones and loss of blood. The silver lining is that I think I am losing weight, but it's strange not to feel hunger and it lands me into trouble when I forget to eat.
Last night after DH gave me the Bloomingdales gift card -- and announced himself as the world's greatest husband -- he broke the news that his parents want to come and visit. OMG! I said sure and that July/August would be a good time, and he said they want to come in May/June. You see, we have 5 frozen embryos left and we were thinking of trying another FET, but we're not sure when that will be or when I will be medically allowed to do it. DH thinks the visit would be better sooner rather than later, but I told him that his parents (mother specifically) stress me out. Lots of stress equals no pregnancy. So, I gave him orders to tell his parents they can visit us anytime between now and the end of April or July/August, and to be straight up with them that we are trying again. I refuse to let them visit us within three weeks of a transfer, especially since this will be our last try. Have I mentioned how I can't stand my passive aggressive MIL? In fact, my SIL has cut my MIL out of her life...and DH sees no problem because he is the golden boy. I can't let her ruin this. What should I do?
4 comments:
Stick to your guns! You have given then ample time to choose from, and if they don't like those times they don't have to come at all. You need to not be stressed. Even if you're not cycling, that is your choice - good luck with it!
Sorry you aren't inspired by shopping. Me too, I feel like this last failure was a sucker punch to my soul (even though it is not nearly as traumatic as your m/c). I'm not interested in anything, but I bought a bunch of puzzle books and jigsaws and I just keep mindlessly busy doing those. My dh thinks I'm going mad. But it keeps me from thinking about things - hoping you find your way through the pain to an easier place.
Way to stand up for yourself? If you need a little white lie to smooth this over, maybe DH can tell them that you're thinking of going away in May/June, so it would be best to plan for July/August. And maybe some dear friend of yours in another state could have a sudden emergency right around then?
Oh, Barren Babe. I'm so sorry that this has been so rough on you. Yes, the Olympics was such a great distraction ... but now it's back to real life.
I think it's a good thing to schedule the in-law visit when it's best for you, mentally and physically. So I agree with everyone above ... stick to your guns and, although a "little white lie" to the in-laws is perfectly acceptable ... you really should continue to be honest with DH about what would be best for YOU.
And speaking of YOU ... it's realllly important that you take care of YOU. Find a way to rouse yourself out of that deep valley and find something that will keep you ... not distracted, but ... I don't know, out and about? Oh, and remember to eat!! That's important also.
Anyway, I know I'm rambling, but I'm wishing you the best and sending positive vibes your way. ((HUGS))
Put your foot down. Your clock still ticks and she'll be around for God knows how long. You set the times that you can handle her coming and don't worry about hurting any feelings. It's we women who end up stressing over the cleaning, groceries, and trying to make everyone comfortable when they visit. Don't feel guilty about making sure that your needs are met.
Five more embryos! Put those little buggers in and lets get cooking! It doesn't cost any extra to put them all in as apposed to only one does it? I say go for it!
T
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